Monday, December 5, 2016

Discomfort


I can be such a difficult person to deal with from time to time.
Actually I'm always kind of tricky to figure out at first glance, but I can assure you that I actually make sense sometime.

I am quite hard with myself and, I admit, with other people too when it comes to behaviours.
I've felt discomfort in the past, I know how it feels when you seem to be out of place, when you don't know what to say, or feel restricted.
I know the feeling of letting someone down and letting myself down too, this is why I promised myself a long time ago that I would have always tried to avoid all the situations where I won't be able to be myself.

This may sound restricting in the first place but it's not.
It's a sort of moral pact I signed with myself to prevent sadness and discomfort.
Which doesn't mean I now am the happiest person on Earth, it just means that I don't do what doesn't allow me to be myself.

This decision also made me think about the society we live in. It's really demanding to be a 21st Century citizen because, if you think about it carefully, you won't fit in anyway.
I mean, you are either too short or too tall, too weird or too white. There' no way you'll ever be matching the "ideal person" standards everybody seems to know but anybody seems to ever reach.

So I made this "weakness" my strength because there's no such beautiful thing as self consciousness.

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