Monday, December 26, 2016

love


It’s funny how many things in life, us, humans, cannot understand completely.
Above all there’s Love.

We say “I love you” to a lot of people and a lot of times during our lives, but how many times do we really mean that.
I found it really weird when I first started learning English that when you want to say that you really like somebody and you care for them you say “I love you” as well as when you mean that you really care for a person so much you’d die for them. There is a huge difference that, to me, it’s not fully expressed by those three words.
In Italian we use different expressions which divide the “level” of love or, if you will, interest you have for that person.

Saying “I love you” is definitely something amazing. Love is not a feeling everybody will be able to feel through his life. This is why these three words have now become meaningless to me half of the times they are pronounced.
You can feel affection, you feel a connection, you feel interest but love it’s rare.

Maybe it’s just me, taking things too seriously.

Yes, maybe it’s just me. Again a lonely monster between common sense and madness. The line is thin.

Friday, December 23, 2016

A new school



Recently I’ve been  thinking about school.
I’m almost done, after 5 years in high school. I really can’t wait to go to university and study something I really like and building step by step my future.
But first, let me talk a little bit about the school system in Italy. I won’t bother you too much, promised.

So, for what concerns high schools, every student must attend it for at least three years.
As soon as you are 16 you can leave school, but not one university will ever accept you in, since you need to do one big exam during the last year of high school to join one.
You get to do the exam  after 5 years of high school.
High schools are divided into “categories”: scientific schools (based on science, physics, math etc.), classical schools (based on greek,  latin, italian and philosophy), linguistic schools, art schools. Ok, you got the idea.
So there isn’t the possibility of changing and choosing the subjects. Once you join a school, you must attend all the lessons they give you. The subjects are, more or less, 10/11 for each school.
We attend school from Monday to Saturday, from 8 am to 1 pm.
And now you’ll probably think “Only 5 hours at school??”. Yep… plus the other 5 hours (at least) at home studying every evening.
Sports and artistic subjects are almost entirely excluded from the schools’ schedules, unless you attend a specific school for those.

Now let me get to the rant.
I think that the first absurd thing is that we cannot choose the subjects we want to study. We are asked, at the age of 14, to pick a school which we’ll have to attend for the next  5 years.
What the hell does a 14 years old know about what he/she is going to do in the future??
Look at me. I attend a scientific school in my city, but I found a deep passion for art two years ago, and now I’m spending all my time and efforts into a school that doesn’t appeal to me at all anymore.

The next absurd thing is that we, Italians, are the only people who have to attend high school for 5-damn-years. When all over the world, people go to university one year before us.

Not to mention all the stress and competition, sick competition, that inevitably leads to anger, frustration and hate. Towards other students and teachers.

Nobody in MY country seems to realize that solutions may be found for all these problems.
Italy is a country lead by old people, working to make their lives better. They invest all their time on planning how to let these same old people rule the country, while kids like me, who cannot even vote yet, stay there, watching everything falling apart.

I’m not the first one talking about these issues, but apparently the majority of teenagers seem to be ok with all of this. They seem to have lost faith in the future. No one has dreams anymore, nor passions.
It’s horrible staying here, watching all this happening and being told that I’m just a kid, wanting to change everything but without the power to make it.

Hopefully, somebody will, sooner or later, understand how overrated is our school system.

And hopefully somebody, will change it.

Monday, December 5, 2016

Discomfort


I can be such a difficult person to deal with from time to time.
Actually I'm always kind of tricky to figure out at first glance, but I can assure you that I actually make sense sometime.

I am quite hard with myself and, I admit, with other people too when it comes to behaviours.
I've felt discomfort in the past, I know how it feels when you seem to be out of place, when you don't know what to say, or feel restricted.
I know the feeling of letting someone down and letting myself down too, this is why I promised myself a long time ago that I would have always tried to avoid all the situations where I won't be able to be myself.

This may sound restricting in the first place but it's not.
It's a sort of moral pact I signed with myself to prevent sadness and discomfort.
Which doesn't mean I now am the happiest person on Earth, it just means that I don't do what doesn't allow me to be myself.

This decision also made me think about the society we live in. It's really demanding to be a 21st Century citizen because, if you think about it carefully, you won't fit in anyway.
I mean, you are either too short or too tall, too weird or too white. There' no way you'll ever be matching the "ideal person" standards everybody seems to know but anybody seems to ever reach.

So I made this "weakness" my strength because there's no such beautiful thing as self consciousness.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

you ARE you (not another cliché post)



This post may actually come out as a helpful thing. Not because I’m a smartass, but just because I’ve come to know some things throughout my teenage years (that I haven’t finished yet) that maybe you can relate to.

You hear a lot of cliché sentences like “you make you” or “you do you” but instead,  the most important thing for me is “you ARE you”.
What’s the difference? Well, you are who you are, you cannot change your inner self.
I don’t mean you can’t get fit or quit smoking, but if you are shy or you hate Justin Bieber, there’s nothing you can do about it! Not much at least.

As long as you try to better yourself, then good for you! But the worse comes when you try to be somebody else or to please someone else.
It can be fine for one year or two, but you’ll soon realize that it’s not you who is living your life. You are just a puppet playing some play you haven’t written.
You’ll end up feeling like you have wasted your life and you’ll feel miserable.

So you ARE you, and be proud.

Better yourself and do everything you can to keep you alright.

Thursday, November 10, 2016

"So I'll start a revolution from my bed"

I hate that people feel unconfortable because of the way they are.
I hate those people who always feel the right of mocking other people because they are different.
I hate that people define "different" all the things they don't know or are afraid of.
I hate those stupid rolled up pants.
I hate the stupid-meaningless "music" that is so "cool" right now.
I hate young people who have no opinions or passion.
I hate people who follow the trends just because they want to be like everybody else.
I hate those homophobic, racist and sexist people that have still a say in world's issues (and are governing us)

I hate all those things but deep inside myself I'm a hopeless hopeful.
I cannot but hope for a better future, making anything I can to build my future and your future.
I hope for a better future because otherwise there won't be a reason to keep on living.

So if today is shit it doesn't necessary mean that tomorrow will be too.
Wake up, do something to make today better, go to bad happy, wait for what tomorrow will bring you.
But still be here, live here, right now.

I don't believe I'm the only weird, crazy, idiot in the world who talks weird and things weird, "out of the schemes" as people say.
We can prove all those bastards who don't believe in us that we can make it and twice better than them.

So if you are like me: welcome abroad in this mad mad world.

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Inspiration / horror

This is a little inspriration mood board for my creepy mind.

Enjoy it


Monday, September 19, 2016

Women power


I’ve been away for a while. I’ve been on a one-week-trip in London and I fell in love.
I can’t wait to visit it, it’s a magical and inspiring city. So different from what I’m used to, which is good since I don’t like what I’m used to.

Since I didn’t really know what to post I thought I may share some of my favorite women-inspirations !


- GRACE NEUTRAL aka the space elf

She is a tattoo artist based in London. I’ve been following her on social medias for almost three years now and I’ve always been inspired by her art and the way she fights the stigma around tattooed people.
You can find her here on Instagram.



- ANASTASIA TASOU


One of the sweetest people I’ve ever heard and seen. I’ve been following her on the internet for a while too and her honesty has always made me more hopeful in this fucked up world.
She can bring light in your life (at least she did in mine) . Her instagram account is here.






- JENNY LAWSON

I think I don’t have to say anything more. She basically helped me during the worst month last year and I’m grateful she exists and she has a blog.
It you ever feel down, search her blog. She has this really fucked up sense of humor and this is why I love her.




- AMANDA ABBINGTON


She is such an inspiring person, she is an animal lover and has a great sense of humor. She has played Mary Watson in Sherlock tv series and you can find her here on twitter.








- JESSIE PAEGE


She is a young youtuber with a lot of crafty ideas and pink hair.
She seems really nice and genuine in her videos. Most of my room decoration plans come from her channel, here.








- MICHELLE PHAN


She is another youtuber and beauty guru (kind of). I really like how she makes her video but I can’t really say I put into practice her advices since I’m a mess when it comes to make-up. Her channel is here.







- HANNAH PIXIE SNOWDON


She is another tattoo artist, she introduced me (in a figurative way since we never met) to the world of tattoo artists and art in general. She is a really nice and peaceful person. You can find here on Instagram.








I think that’s it for now.
 I am obviously forgetting someone that I will add as soon as I realize who she is.

Have a nice day (or night, wherever you are).


Ila

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Useless Art

Today was a normal day, pretty usual, until I heard something on TV that really worried me: one of Banksy's most famous art pieces (“Spy booth”) had been taken down during a house reparation in Cheltenham.


source
I'm not blaming anyone in particular for the accident, because it is said it was an accident. If that was an intentional act indeed… well, it would be really horrible.

For years in the past, street artists have been blamed for their acts of deliberately "ruining the cities" with their "useless doodles" on the walls. But first let me explain what I mean with "street artists": the ones who have a purpose, that actually make art out of their imagination and respecting the environment they are working with.

Well, if street art was really this "useless act of vandalism" why would people be so worried about the social impact of these illegal acts? Because I bet it’s not just a matter of preserving the walls of the cities from being contaminated with colors and paintings. Probably it's because art is one of the most easily comprehensible form of expressions, common to every human being on earth. 


An artist can convey his/her opinion on a specific topic just with a drawing. Then, that artwork, is left for the audience to appreciate it, discuss it or disliked it, is also left to the place it was meant to be: the street.

I think this is what Banksy has tried to do throughout the years: let us know that there is another way, an unconventional way, of thinking.

Getting back to the main topic of this post: what if on the wall of that house was painted something like the La Gioconda or some other "museum must-have"?



Look around, art is not just in museums.
Art is around us.

Thursday, August 18, 2016

The new generation


Hopefully this is not going to be the same “the new generation sucks” post. Also because I’m not here to throw shit on people. But it seems that a lot of young-people have lost interest in the world.


It’s sad to see that there aren’t so many young people inspired by anything anymore.
They seem to hear but they do not listen, they do not pay attention, they watch but don’t see.
I know, I’m one of them, always ready to google the answer to your question if I don’t know what you’re talking about and always updated via e-mail to the last thing my favorite band did.
I’m not putting myself on a pedestal and pointing my finger towards everybody just to feel better.
I’m just discussing something that worries me.

I constantly feel an outsider because I care too much about what I love. I can be so passionate I can turn into a machine!
For example I could be painting for 10 hours straight if I enjoyed the subject I’m painting. You could find me at 3 am playing the guitar and composing some music if I cannot sleep and I feel the urge to play. I could grab information about all the projects my favorite actor or band has done just to keep myself informed about everything I could (possibly) enjoy in the future. I could talk for hours about a book or a film I enjoyed. I could watch the clouds for hours and find peace in the process. Now turn all those “could” in “can”, because I’ve actually found myself in those situations in the past.

Probably this is just my lifestyle: finding beauty and enjoyment in everything that interests me. Or maybe I’m just a high functioning weirdo. One does not exclude the other.

People (particularly the young ones) do not question what they are doing or how they are spending their lives, what they do believe in, what they want to become, what makes them feel better.
Most of us (teenagers) seem to be paralyzed, asleep, hypnotized by the sound of nothingness that surrounds us. In a world where it’s better to show off how “cool we look” rather than achieving something priceless such as a purpose or a dream.

Think about this: for our government leaders it’s easier to rule upon a country where people don’t question anything than a country where every mind is active and thinks in different ways.
Ok, that was just a political fact thrown there, to shake you off a bit.

Anyway, my main concern is “where are we going?”
I don’t really want to lose hope in my generation but… come on, do every teenager listen to that music?? I really wish not!!

I’d like to finish off with this:
- If you’re a teenager please, think about who you REALLY are. If you are not the type of person that makes long-term plans it’s fine, you are not in a rush and you don’t have to run. Your life it’s like a road: if you do not pay attention and run too fast you are going to trip over. The important thing to get back up is to understand who you are IN THIS MOMENT and be the best you can possibly be.

- If you’re not a teenager anymore and you look at us (teenagers) with that weird eyebrow as a sign of disapproval, please don’t. Try to teach us what you’ve learnt through life. We can’t promise you we won’t make your same mistakes, but we’ll try to do the best we can.

At the end of this “rant” you may think I’m wise.

No, I’m not. I have figured out some things and I just wrote them down.


collage made by me
I don't own the SINGLE PICS
only the collage itself

Thursday, August 11, 2016

NOT BELONGING

Now that I've grown up a bit, I think that most of my insecurities were caused by the feeling of not belonging somewhere.

The first issue was with my “style”.

Since I was born I was raised as an independent/alternative kid. I've been thought that being "different" doesn't always equal to "bad". So, when I grew up a little bit more I started building my own wardrobe which meant owning mainly black clothes & band t shirts. On the other hand I also liked bright colors and weird patterned clothes. I still have those pieces in my closet  but at the time I couldn't define myself as either "goth" or "punk" and this was the main problem: I couldn’t define myself in ANY POSSIBLE WAY ! This sense of "not belonging" led me to feel uncomfortable with myself.
NOW I think I don't need to sport any particular type of clothes or style, I can be whoever I want whenever I want without the need to necessary be able to define myself since I’m much more than just my clothes.


I hope this post wasn't completely pointless. it is definitely not for me because I'm taking records of my progress in the weird game called LIFE.

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Sherlock Season 4

We can surely say that Sherlock has been (and still is) one of the most successful tv show ever aired by the BBCOne in the UK.

After gaining international success (and making the fans wait for a really long time), Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat (co-creators) have finally announced that the one and only world consultive detective will return on the screens.
Before you get too excited I'll warn you: we still have to wait for a while. Shootings for the fourth series have just finished (on the 5th August) so the show will air sometime in 2017.

Yep, it's a lot. But don't worry, we will still have a chance to see our favorite actors busy with other projects.

- Martin Freeman in the new tv series "StartUp", airing this fall on Crackle in the US
- Benedict Cumberbatch as Marvel's "Doctor Strange". The film will premiere internationally the 26th October.
- Andrew Scott and Mark Gatiss will be in the new BBC film "Denial"

That's all I know and all WE have to know by far.

A SWEET reminder that us, as fans, should just be interested in their careers not in their private lives, unless they want us to know something.

Here are some pics from the SETLOCK I found on twitter or around the web. All pics have sources unless I couldn't find them. If something is yours, let me know.
It's not my purpose to steal ANYTHING.


This is when all started // source

source
Mary & John being adorable ... and confused ...  with a baby

Apparently this dog will be the new star of the season !


Molly !? Is that you ??  // source


oh Mark, we all really hope it isn't !! // source
That was such a classy wrap party // source 

Friday, July 29, 2016

WHAT’S A STANDARD?

After different weird thoughts and thinking I’ve been doing in the past days, I have figured out that we think in a “standard” way. At least the majority of us do it, even unconsciously.

This way of thinking to me is weird, because the things considered “standard” and “normal” are for the major part OVERRATED nowadays.
For example sexuality and what you’re supposed to like, what music you should listen to, how you should dress, what you should study and eventually what career you are going to pursue.

It’s not true that if you’re gay everyone will mock you for your entire life.
It’s not true that if you’re tattooed you’ll never find a job.
It’s not true that if you like metal music you are a murderer or a bad person.
It’s not true that if you love art you won’t make a living out of that.

Obviously all the life-choices listed above require a strong will to keep being yourself and not caring of other people opinions. And this is an important requirement because there’s still a “stigma” around the topics written above.


An in 21st Century this is just bullshit to me.


ILA

Thursday, July 28, 2016

Nevermind

I surely have had better days. Where mental sanity looked concrete. But I’m not the type of person that cries often, at least not anymore.
I’ve been really busy between work and trying not to explode with the creative madness that has hit me recently so violently. I constantly feel the need of making something and keeping me busy (on a creative level).

I feel like everything is trying to assault me, but I’m not even close to fear. I’m more intrigued by all of this noise around me.
Everything keeps me busy.

Probably I’m just trying not to overthink about my past. Or probably I just need all this noise to keep moving. Like a machine, a complicated engine. I’m not even close to break down.  Luckily I have a lot of things to do and to think about rather than my own concerns or issues.
The majority will say that pursuing this way is useless and it won’t help me, but I’m convinced that projecting your issues on something outside yourself helps you to actually understand yourself.
It’s like an overall look at it.
Detached. Rational. Probably helpful.


I don’t know shit about psychology but I’m interested in all the weirdness that a single mind can handle. Starting from my own.


ILA


P.S. Oh anyway, I have a twitter now. Basically I'm keeping myself even more busy by keeping tracks of my favorite bands/actors. 

Friday, July 15, 2016

It's ok



It's ok to be confused, to question ourselves and what surrounds us. 
It's ok to live day by day without a plan.
It's ok not knowing what we'll do "when we'll get old".

It's ok simply because nothing is simple in life and nothing is already predicted. You can give yourself some time to think and understand yourself.

But don't push yourself to do something just because it's "late". 
What does "late" means? Late for what?

Taking your time doesn't mean doing anything. Probably it means the exact opposite: it means doing a little bit of everything.
Only by doing so, you'll understand what you like and dislike.

But until that moment... keep your mind wide open.

ila

Friday, July 8, 2016

WRITER’S BLOCK

It’s been really a long time since I posted something. But before I explain why I didn’t post  I’d like to tell you about a really upsetting event that happened yesterday: I felt the will to study.
Yeah, pretty upsetting isn’t it? You would have never expected something like this, me neither. But it was weird. I opened my Italian literature book and I started reading, and I liked it!

So, at midnight, I closed the book and started thinking: why do the same things I do at school interest me more when I’m far away from school?
I came to the conclusion that is the “spirit” of school that kills (literally) my will to study.
The anxiety of tests, the constant worry about the deadlines, homeworks and anxiety, anxiety, ANXIETY.

I think this is the problem: we are always worried for what other people expect us to do. Obviously in our life there are deadlines and rules that have to be respected, even if the majority of them are just trivial and useless. Ok, I went for a tangent.
The point is that we are more worried about what we SHOULD do than what we WANT to do.
Here it is: I WANTED to study and read and I liked it! So we should (and I say it more to myself than to you) WANTING to do something rather than HAVING to do something for someone else.

What does it have to do with my blog? Well guys, this should also be a pointless post as far as I’m concerned. But it is really not my style.
This post makes me think about my lack of posting lately: I didn’t know what other people wanted me to write here. But again, if I think about it: I am the one who decides here and I don’t have to restrain myself from writing something rather than something else.

I don’t want to give this blog a neat cut. I should write whatever I feel confident to write. I want to leave me all the options opened and not just focus on one particular topic since in my everyday-life I’m not interested in a single topic either!

Ok, I’m done with the rant.

Ona  positive note the sky was really beautiful this evening.


Monday, June 27, 2016

"The light behind your eyes"

I just wanted to share with you some thoughts.

I had to fight and I still am fighting to find my true self which is, I firmly believe is, somewhere between my brain and my heart.
only the brave ones, the open minded ones can find themselves. other will just wonder through the desolation of the world seen by those who cannot (or don't want) open their eyes.
so don't wait for things to happen and to occasions to hit you, but be the brave one and take your life with both hands. 
look into your life, don't be scared... you WILL be free ... and happy.


song:: "the light behind your eyes"
band:: my Chemical Romance


. ila .

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Vacation







Sorry for the lack of posts. 
I've been travelling from my hometown to my granparents' house.
It took a lot  because it's a 6 hours car-trip with a lot of sun and sweat. At least we listened to sme good music since I brought with me almost my entire collection of rock cds.

As soon as I'll be back home I'll start working to a new project with one friend of mine.
And I'll be working (in a proper office with computers and shit) too from mid July to mid August. 
The only problem will be dressing like a normal person (or almost) but I'll work on it.

💀other (anti)social media:
-instagram: moshinthemoonlight
-tumblr: moshinthemoonlight

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

A N G R Y playlist



Walk, Pantera
People=Shit, Slipknot
Before I Forget, Slipknot
Unholy Confessions, Avenged Sevenfold
Psychosocial, Slipknot
Wait And Bleed, Slipknot
Duality, Slipknot
Riot, Bullet For My Valentine
The Beautiful People, Marilyn Manson
Smell Like Teen Spirit, Nirvana
Pulse Of The Maggots, Slipknot
All My Life, Foo Fighters
The Pretender, Foo Fighters
Holiday, Green Day
Na na na, My Chemical Romance

Tuesday, June 21, 2016

S A D Playlist




XIX, Slipknot
Behind Blue Eyes, Limp Bizkit
Snuff, Slipknot
I Hate Everything About You, Three Days Grace
Rescue Me, Coldrain
The Unforgiven I, Metallica
The Diary Of Jane, Breaking Benjamin
Orion, Metallica 
Breath, Breaking Benjamin
Thanks For The Memories, Fall Out Boys
Time Is Running Out, Muse
Dear God, Avenged Sevenfold
Vermilion pt.2, Slipknot
Tears Don’t Fall, Bullet For My Valentine
In The End, Linkin Park
All These Things I Hate (Revolve Around Me), Bullet For My Valentine
What I’ve Done, Linkin Park
Don’t Look Back In Anger, Oasis
Renegades, X Ambassadors
Dream On, Aerosmith
Best Of You, Foo Fighters
Boulevard Of Broken Dreams, Green Day
Wake Me Up When September Ends, Green Day

Alternative Summer



And another Summer has arrived.
For a lot of people this means lot of fun and a pretty sun-tan.
To me it just means suffering under the sun and getting sun-burnt. My skin it’s too pale and my wardrobe too dark for summer.
But lately I’ve been trying to find some ways to avoid getting burnt or getting mad every time I have to get out of my house.

Here are three ways to survive to summer keeping our style.

💀 Cut everything that can be cut. You just need some clothes and scissors. Oh, also some creativity. For those who have really few ideas, I’ll make it easier, here are some:

1] band t-shirts:
Take some band t-shirts and just cut the sleeves. Can you feel your armpits breathing? Nice feeling huh?

2] long pants:
We all have that pair of pants/jeans we don’t really like but that we keep, saying we’ll wear them next winter. Yep, those, if you haven’t burnt them already you can easily cut them and turn them into shorts.
Watch out the pockets!! They may be too long  (those pants weren’t made like shorts, duh) , before you cut them and go around with pockets in which STRANGELY everything disappears when put inside of them, just turn them inside-out while you cut the legs, so you won’t brutally scratch them .

3] cut what can’t be cut too:
Surviving first! So get crazy on those t-shirts and rip them as much as you want.
Here are some examples :


//  skull cut  //  wings cut


4] fishnets:
If you don’t want to lose your gothic style during summer (which is good !) then make a gothic-intelligent decision. Instead of wearing crazy printed tights just rip them.
Too brutal? Again it’s all about surviving.
For those of you who don’t want to rip off their beloved tights, even if it’s funnier to destroy them yourself, you can buy them already tipped off.
For the more creative ones, here are some videos:






💀 Modify everything. Now that you’ve cut everything you may have lost some of your alternative spirit. That’s ok because during winter you can wear different layers of clothes and create something unique, but it’s possible also during Summer.

1] garters:
They are sexy but above all really decorative.
I’ve made one some weeks ago.
If you wanna be less satanic, here is another tutorial.

But thanks to the internet you can find some of them pre-made.
Well, I’m a pro-DIY person but it’s your life (and your money).


2] studs:
Since I’m a fan of studs I could suggest you to put them everywhere (I’ve seen some weird studded panties too).
Here are some examples:






💀 Crazy hairstyles. Summer is the best moment to experiment. Ok, I have to admit I’m not a really good helper on this point since I brush my hair more or less once a week but I’ve found some interesting things to do.

1] dye:
They can be semi-permanent or permanent. Natural (henna) or not.

Just be sure to take care of your hair in order to avoid damaging them.


2] dreadlocks / braids:
You can go full head  or not.
Don’t worry if you have short hair, you can use extensions to get the look.


Ok, I’m done for now.
Those are just some tips for those who struggle a lot like me during summer.

Let’s try to survive and have fun, maybe in the moonlight instead of the sunlight.